Rediscovering Community in the Land of Individualism
It is our observation that older adults do not make the decision to start researching Senior Living lightly. Taking this first step presupposes an awareness that late middle-age – a chapter in life that is smooth and enjoyable to many – is coming to an end. If one manages to approach it with an open mind, the stage that follows has the potential to be transformative. After all, this is the first and only time you will be an older adult. If you don’t self-actualize now, when will you?
This is why our Residential Living sales team do not come from the real estate world. Their title is Retirement Counselor and they are life coaches for that season of transition which can take place anytime between your early sixties and your mid-eighties. Individuals and couples come to us with some expectations, which they have formed during successive chapters of life experience. Just as they did when they were young parents or landing in a new town for a job, their focus jumps too quickly to one aspect – the costs, or to another – the size of the residence, the number of closets, etc.
That is when the skill of our Retirement Counselors becomes valuable. Over the years they have guided hundreds of families through the process, and they know where the pressure points lie. More important than the cost or the features of the cottage or apartment is the great question: “do you fully realize the opportunities that will come your way with community life?”
For reasons that extend far beyond this short article, American life has become lonelier in the past hundred years. The shift from town to suburb has drilled into our psyche that nothing is more valuable than privacy. “Detached” is seen as most desirable. As a result, opportunities to mill around in a familiar group are fewer to us than they are to our Chinese contemporaries enjoying their sunrise Tai Chi Chuan, to Peruvians savoring a late ceviche on the Plaza de Armas, or – perish the thought – to talkative Finns in a communal sauna.
In Old Age, to be blunt, what is most important is what we do with others and for others. This comes after decades of valuing independence and individualism: quite a turnaround. Our Retirement Counselors are careful not to lean too heavily on this, not wishing to portray life in a community like ours as a never-ending episode of Love Boat on land. But the truth is, when villagers have been with us 5, 10, or 20 years, it makes no difference whether they are outgoing or reserved: what they value the most out of life at CKV is the abundance of rich human relationships.